Some Tubes’ lyrics excerpts

White Punks On Dope
Evans/Spooner/Steen

Teenage had a race for the night time
Spent my cash on every high I could find
Wasted time in every school in L.A.
Getting loose, I didn't care what the kids say

We're white punks on dope
Mom & Dad moved to Hollywood
Hang myself when I get enough rope
Can't clean up, though I know I should
White punks on dope
White punks on dope ....


Boy Crazy
Spooner

Was it Jimmy's fault on your first date
you promised Mom you wouldn't be home late
At the drive-in you climbed in the back
Skipped the movies and forgot the snack
Petting heavy didn't bother you
Your eighth grade teacher showed you what to do
Failed your English and Biology
But you learned the facts of life from A to Z

Boy Crazy, from town to town
Boy Crazy, from town to town
Forgot all the names
They're all the same
Forgot all the names ....


What Do You Want From Life
Spooner/Evans

What do you want from life
To kidnap an heiress
or threaten her with a knife
What do you want from life
To get cable TV
and watch it every night

There you sit
a lump in your chair
Where do you sleep
and what do you wear
when you're sleeping

What do you want from life
An Indian guru
to show you the inner light
What do you want from life
a meaningless love affair
with a girl that you met tonight

How can you tell when you're doin' alright
Does your bank account swell
While you're dreaming at night
How do know when you're really in love
Do violins play when you're touching the one
That you're loving

What do you want from life
Someone to love
and somebody that you can trust
What do you want from life
To try and be happy
while you do the nasty things you must

Well, you can't have that, but if you're an American citizen you are entitled to:
a heated kidney shaped pool,
a microwave oven--don't watch the food cook,
a Dyna-Gym--I'll personally demonstrate it in the privacy of your own home,
a king-size Titanic unsinkable Molly Brown waterbed with polybendum,
a foolproof plan and an airtight alibi,
real simulated Indian jewelry ....


The Tubes World Tour
Spooner/Steen/Waybill

The girls got embarrassed
when we did our act in Paris
Same way that they did in L.A.
And we really had a battle
when we did it in Seattle
Vancouver on the very next day
San Diego kept us busy
We got so dizzy
with the interviews and radio shows
The fans were no turkeys
when the Tubes played Albuquerque
They stood up and shout and let us know

Bonjour, bonjour
The Tubes World Tour
A mighty important crusade
Tres chouette mi amore
The Tubes World Tour
We'll be leavin' as soon as we're paid

They threw us in the slammer
when we did it in Miamer
Mondo Bondage blew their mind
The kids were screamin' more in Baltimore
Thought they would never unwind
They rushed Dr. Fee
in Washington D.C.
A.M.A. didn't go for the chainsaw
Played Town Without Pity
just for New York City
And Quay knocked 'em dead with his big guitar ....

Wild Women Of Wongo
The Tubes

From the foggy woggy banks
of the Limpopo River,
there come the sounds of
Female ecstasy (I shiver),
Wet and wanton, their cries
caress my swollen ears, with building
fears, of this forsaken land of years.
Visions of furious fire-goddesses wielding
Blunt spits; figments of erotic escapades
with all branches of armed forces.
Surrounding, abounding,
they stoop to conquer with sighs and
anxious whispers in a slow, steady rhythm.

Wongo.
Wild Women of Wongo.
How does their song go?
Make a me want mo, (Wild Women!)
Wongo.
No man can say no.
Wild Women of Wongo.
How does their song go? ....

Don't Touch Me There
Nagle/Dornacker

Oooo baby,
Move closer to me
I've had all that I can stand
Take hold of me with your hands

Oh baby,
You give me the chills
Whisper low in my ear
Let knows how it feels
just to know you are near

Your body gives me a thrill
as it leans against mine
I love how it feels
with your jeans against mine

The smell of burning leather
as we hold each other tight
As our rivets rub together
flashing sparks into the night
At this moment of surrender darling
if you really care
Don't touch me there ....